[Gpdd] [MISC] my loss

[truejedi at bellsouth.net]

I want to thank everyone who wrote to me about my loss of Motah.  I also want to apologize for my posts yesterday.  I know the first one was long and I may have poured my heart out a little too much.  I was in shock I think and still a bit am.  I just never had to say goodbye to a piggy before and I took it alot harder than I immagined I would.  I am doing better today though.  I still feel the deep and painful hurt but it's different now.  I'm accepting it more and that is helping me.  Yesterday I didn't want to accept the fact that I would never see her again.  I kept telling myself I would wake up from a bad dream and go in her room and see her popcorning.  I was just wishing to have her back.  I kept saying I would do anything, and give any amount of money, and take any amount of pain just to see her again.  Late last night I went to sleep on the couch.  I don't remember what I was dreaming but the very second before I woke up I saw her.  I walked in her room and nothing was in there, not even Muinea.  It was just her and me.  She was all better and she was eating something.  She looked up at me as if she was telling me she was ok and then I woke up.  I didn't get to pet her or anything but that dream felt so so so real.  It felt like it really happened.  It was enough to make me feel good for the first time yesterday.  I woke up and had the biggest smile on my face and it was just so comforting.  Then I realized she wouldn't want me to be sad and hurting.  She wants me to be as happy as I was before so I can still take care of Muinea.  Thank you all again so much for your comforting words and encouragement.  
Misty...
slave to Muinea (and Motah who is now at Rainbow Bridge but in my heart forever)